I Refuse to Miss this Moment [and a recipe for a Pomegranate, Lime, + Ginger Mocktail]
I was telling a couple friends yesterday that I am actually looking forward to my kids being home from school over winter break. I’m not sure I’ve ever said that before.
My lack of looking forward to winter break isn’t because of my them. I love my kids and happen to think they’re awesome. Of course, they make me crazy sometimes. It’s not exactly easy being home with four little ones all day every day–especially when the air outside feels so cold it bites your skin, and I can’t ship them to the backyard as much as I do in the summer.
But my kids also make me laugh, they’re quick to forgive me, and they love fiercely. But last year, I was fully smothered by the haze of the newborn phase and all the physical and emotional junk that comes with that–including recovering from a C-section. My husband also got COVID over that Christmas break. I was still in pain and not entirely healed from surgery, I didn’t want him around the kids (especially the three-week-old), and I felt utterly and completely overwhelmed. During prior Christmas seasons, depression and anxiety loomed large over every part of my body and soul. It was during one of those years that my dad asked me, “How are you, really?”, and I couldn’t stop crying. I was not okay.
This year, I find myself baking more than I need to–just because I want to. I find myself planning outings for the kids and getting excited about making gingerbread houses with them. (Side note: here are two tips here to actually enjoy this activity: First, use one of the store-bought kits. Second, assemble with a hot glue gun. It will save you from having to paste your sanity back together afterwards.) I find myself rummaging through the clothes at Costco trying to find snow pants for myself so that I’m ready to make a snowman and go sledding. In the past, I spent more than a few snow days laying in bed trying to preserve my physical and mental health.
I’m no veteran parent, but I’ve been a mom and a human long enough to know that everyone may get sick. All our plans may go out the window. The Christmas break may come with unexpected grief. But today, I’m looking forward to it. And that is a miracle in itself, one I couldn’t even imagine just a couple years ago. The mere thought that I’m looking forward to this break is a gift from God that I don’t want to miss seeing and appreciating.
A lot of hard things have happened over the years, and there will inevitably be more to come. But I refuse to let myself miss this moment because I’m afraid of what could happen. I refuse to let worry steal what I have now.
The other shoe might drop. But for now, it hasn’t. And I’m grateful.
Pomegranate, Lime, + Ginger Mocktail
1 part cranberry juice (100% juice, no sugar added–not cranberry juice cocktail)
2 parts pomegranate juice (100% pomegranate juice)
3 parts ginger beer, plus more to taste (I used Reed’s Jamaican style ginger beer)
Squeeze of lime juice (for 1 mocktail, I used the juice from 1 wedge of lime)
Pomegranate seeds or lime wedges for garnish (optional)
Fill glasses partway with ice. Add juices and ginger beer. Stir gently. Garnish with fresh pomegranate seeds or lime wedges.
Notes:
When I made this on a large scale, I used ginger ale instead of ginger beer (try to find a strong-tasting brand, such as Vernors, if possible.) This way, you can just purchase a 2-liter bottle of ginger ale rather than using small bottles of ginger beer.
If you want to make this a cocktail, add a splash of liquor. Vodka would work well, or for a little more depth of flavor, bourbon is delicious.
